It always feels risky to make a change in your life—cross into new plan – to start a new relationship, reclaim preparation for a sport, sell something, leave a job, start a new school year…
The rock-head within will center fully on how you can fail, and focus on how you will surely die. But I want you to know how much muscle and energy you will gain by dipping your feet in a wet paint bucket alongside your friend Jesus. DearSoul, you need to know the enemy is out to make you question your assignment. Even when you want to say “YES” to change in your life and you want it more than anything – why do we still act like we are on our way to the doctor to get a shot? Instead of party hats and pompoms, we start looking for a pillow and an aspirin. Our people say, ‘oh you must be so excited about your next move’. It would seem impolite to tell them you feel like you have a maggot infested tomato-worm chewing mazes through your innards.
The waiting and the dreams both blissful and bleak can wear you out. If feels like you are walking into Six Flags with a zillion flashing options calling you – but in real life, you know there will only be one ending. In my brain – fear tends to come in a tsunami wave. My imaginings are never half-done or mediocre. Just when all the seams come loose, that’s when, The Almighty brings it all together.
You know, it is hardly ever the actual matter that does us in – it is the flirting of our fears hacking away in our fantasies. But, here is the deal – we must move into newness where we feel weak. It nourishes us to get in over our head. It is good for you. That is where His Spirit will take over in our desperation. Getting in too deep makes us sweat. Pray. Climb. Put our hands up. And, finally slash our way in through the foggy haze to discover more of His potential in us. It is an installation. It’s a birth. This is where the moments of acute awe and a shiver course all around us, pushing through us, pour out of us. ..
‘Fear nothing that you are about to suffer. [Dismiss your dread and your fears!] Behold, the devil is indeed about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested and proved and critically appraised, and for ten days you will have affliction. Be loyally faithful unto death [even if you must die for it], and I will give you the crown of life. (Revelation 2:10 AMP)
It takes dogged courage to be really alive and let ourselves be called. Crossing the battle-line of my way or His way is always laced with a riot of amplified senses and heart hammering pounding. The interesting thing is that once your press through; your growth outweighs any regret. When we cross over into eternity, there will be no regret for choosing the walk through the fire with and for God Most High. You know what you need to do Dearheart. Cherish that part of you that is timid. Stop saying “I shouldn’t feel this.” Know that you know that you are growing; closing in on the edge, daring to move into the unknown, because that is where God’s best is waiting.